This may be one of the few times I ever find myself saying this, but I completely agree with Maureen Dowd about this and do not think she is overstating the problem. I decided awhile back never to talk on the phone while driving, and whenever I can tell a friend or family member is calling me from a car, I scold and shame. This isn’t just about cars and phones, though. Dowd cites a Harvard professor who says using digital devices gives you “a dopamine squirt. She goes on to write:
That explains the Pavlovian impulse of people who are out with friends or dates to ignore them and check their BlackBerrys and cellphones, even if 99 out of 100 messages are uninteresting. They’re truffle-hunting for that scintillating one.
Americans woke up one day to find that they were don’t-miss-a-moment addicts who feel compelled to respond to all messages immediately.
The tech industry is our drug dealer, feeding the intense social and economic pressure to stay constantly in touch with employers, colleagues, friends and family.
I read this last night and emailed it to myself to blog about. Then this morning, while getting my first dopamine dump of the day, I saw this blog post from Sara Ryan, describing the anxiety she feels when she gets behind in her Internet reading.
We tend to see our Internet/technology addiction as a bad habit, I think, something about which we say, “I really should cut down…” Or we joke about it or Tweet about it. But it’s kind of a giant problem. We already know from research that the way our brain pathways work changes depending on what mental habits we’re in. If you’re like me and feel like you’ve developed ADD since web 2.0, you probably have.
Last night after reading the Dowd column I was laying in bed, feeling anxious about my recently acquired iPhone. Did I need it? Was it too late to return it? Should I check it right now to see if anyone responded to my latest Tweet, or mentioned me? (Seeking validation that my existence matters, perhaps?) No, I shouldn’t. But also I don’t need to return it in a moment of panic. It’s a tool, and a very handy one. Like so many things in life, it just needs to be put in its proper place. I know that, and I’ve made good progress on Project Reform Brain Pathways.
What I worry about are the people who don’t know, who haven’t even considered that all this looking into screens might possibly be very bad for them personally (not just for safety reasons, though the Dowd column is certainly compelling on that front), bad for culture and society, bad for humanity. Of course the tools themselves are great and I don’t dispute what they’ve given us as society. But our relationship to the tools needs to be as masters, not slaves.
13 comments for this post
Sometimes if I wake up in the middle of the night, I will check my email from my phone. Sometimes, while waiting for it to load, I fall back to sleep. I do think I’ve developed ADD not just since web 2.0 but since I began using the internet regularly 14 years ago when I started college.
I never use the cell phone in the car, though. I just can’t – I don’t even take a sip of coffee at a stop light. The radio/cd player is distraction enough.
sara z. Reply:
July 23rd, 2009 at 1:36 pm
@liz, Yes, it started in 1995 for me, too. IRC, Usenet, etc. When I’m getting impatient with myself to hurry up and change already, I remind myself I’ve been a hardcore user for over half my adult life. Patience.
I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately because I feel like the latest jumps in technology have made us obsessive talkers rather than listeners. Sure, we’re skimming through Twitter feeds and Facebook status updates, but we’re connecting to less real information and real people. And all in the interest of connecting more.
If we’re “following” over a hundred people, isn’t that really like following no one – because we can’t keep up with that many people. So instead we focus our energy on what we say, instead of responding to what others say – or even really reading it.
We’re trading quality for quantity, friends for followers, talking for tweeting. (And it goes to show how bad it is that I now plan to tweet that statement because it’s the perfect length.)
sara z. Reply:
July 23rd, 2009 at 1:37 pm
@MotherReader, Yes, definitely a sense of the third-grade classroom – “oooh oooh oooh me me me!” with our hands in the air
This summer has really brought that angst to the fore for me. I’ve had to cut way back on hours, so every time I return to the office I’m feeling snowed under by the deluge of emails, follower notices, posts in the reader, and requests to connect. I’m skimming more and absorbing less and I don’t like it.
I haven’t traded up from my just-a-picture phone, though that internal debate has started. I want to still be someone who unplugs on vacation, and I worry that a phone with a keyboard will be like taking work with me everywhere. Yet, I would like to be able to be able to feel productive while I’m waiting for my new driver’s license picture at the DMV.
I really rely on tech-savvier folks like Mark Blevis and Greg Pincus to help the “they’re just tools” part in perspective. I’m not one to jump at every new thing and am not competitive enough to be in the race for “the most” of something. I just want to leverage the time I do have to work smarter and connect better.
More Irony: MotherReader’s tweet is what got me here!
sara z. Reply:
July 23rd, 2009 at 1:38 pm
@Terry Doherty, Yes! I want to leverage time and work smarter, too, so I don’t think I’ll ever go luddite. With all the tools, it just takes a lot of discipline and intention.
I wondered if for me this was high school residue. Imagine it grayish, and sticky, and hard to wash away… the idea that if I don’t keep speaking up, I will disappear and no one will miss me. So, I have to keep checking in, seeing what everyone is up to, making my little comments.
UGH.
That sounds like a very bad prospect. But a potentially true one.
sara z. Reply:
July 23rd, 2009 at 1:39 pm
@tanita, I think this is certainly part of it. Very certainly.
Thank you for posting this and for recommending the Maureen Dowd article.
It’s something I’ve been thinking about, too. Today I realized that every morning I delete about five e-mails without even looking at them – Borders Rewards promotions, a few mailing lists, some boring things from my professional association – and thought, “I should really just unsubscribe to those. … Nah. It’s nice to have e-mail in the morning.” What?? Seriously, I get some kind of validation from those?
I DO feel like I’m more informed now than I used to be – up on new books from the blogs I read, up on current events from reading the news online…but I also have a harder and harder time remembering what task I was on my way to do, or why I even opened that tab in the first place. And that scares the bejeezus out of me. But just one more e-mail check before I log off.
(And I don’t even OWN a cell phone. Never have. I can only imagine. *shudder*)
sara z. Reply:
July 23rd, 2009 at 1:40 pm
@Laura, That happens to me more and more, too, the forgetting what I was doing. I’ve been chalking it up to approaching 40 but maybe I should blame the internet for that, too!
Really enjoyed this post, and really needed to hear it. I’m amazed by how much time I can waste online. Sometimes I think Facebook in particular is the worst for me because it creates this illusion of a relationship. Makes it all so easy or something. I’m not trying to be melodramatic
but it really is weird the way the concept of community keeps twisting around. In some ways, the internet is an amazing means of connection. In other ways, it makes me a bit more desensitized and uninclined to really get to know people (and not just know about them). Your last line is perfect on this, and something I have to remind myself of in many situations. (Random aside: since I was a little girl, I’ve had so many issues with weight and food and all that. The same principle – being a master and not a slave – applies there too, I’ve learned.)
I think you nailed it — masters to the technology tools, that is. It’s all about balance. Moderation. I love the connection I get through online tools, but if I don’t stop myself, I can let it be a real time-suck. But I take control. And stop myself.
That “truffle-hunting for that scintillating one” makes me think of call waiting, which I absolutely refuse to own. Rudest modern technology there is. “Hold on just a sec,” people are saying, “a more important caller just beeped in.” No thanks. And I mean, are we THAT busy? That we have to pay the phone company to keep us in line?
“I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately because I feel like the latest jumps in technology have made us obsessive talkers rather than listeners.”
I really worry about this especially, Pam.
Sara, I am already a compulsive person.I don’t think Dowd is overtating the problem. It is a real issue for me to be consciously aware of how sucked in I get.
It’s time for me to be more aggressive about stepping away from the screen and this will be hard.